Engaging with the change placed on you

How do you engage with change when it’s placed upon you? And how do you do this when the things you love and bring your energy are not part of that change?

1. We like to change others, but when change is placed upon us, it’s hard

Most people who get this email are in the business of wanting to change the world for the better. We have a lot of energy for that. But having change placed upon us is unpleasant.

The name for that feeling is reactance — the psychological word for resistance. It’s a basic psychophysiological response to what we consider a threat to our agency and resources.

2. Use change placed upon you to remember how it feels for others

I have actually come to find having change put upon me as refreshing. It reminds me what change feels like, so that any changes I want to make to others, I can remember how the other person may feel.

I think this makes one a far better agent of change.

3. Embrace the experiment

When change is placed upon us, can we see it as an experiment?

Hypothesis: How else can I apply my strengths? How else can I adapt what I love? What dormant abilities reside in me? How can I use this as a chance to go deeper into who I am?

4. Yet, bring your thunder

Yes, embrace the experiment. But at the same time, bring your thunder. Don’t hide your light.

It’s not either/or. It’s both/and.