Engagingly doing sales

How does one do sales in an engaging way?

1. Engaging sales = Competence + Warmth

I always bring human engagement back to the Stereotype Content Model, which states that people evaluate others based on their competence and warmth.

Warmth means: you won’t cheat me, you can be trusted. Competence means: you’re actually able to do what you say you’ll do.

No warmth, and I think I’m just a number to you. No competence, and while I might like you, I have no idea what you could do for me.

2. Most “sales” is competence without warmth

We all know these. No regard for the person. But there is a greater level of sales hell:

3. Fake warmth lowers both competence and warmth

We all know the terrible attempts at “personalisation” before a sales message, which by trying to fake warmth actually undermine your competence as well. These techniques are so patently bad, and yet you used them, which brings your competence into question.

4. Those who struggle with sales often have warmth without competence

This is when someone is warm, but doesn’t signal their competence. So you think they’re an ok person, but you don’t think they’re competent. This has been my ditch over the years — offering lots of help for free, without offering my services.

5. Good sales is competence + warmth

You can think of it as a version of “firm but fair.” Competent and honest about your offer, with the warmth of listening and understanding.

In the long run — B2B sales, brand building, recurring sales — competence and warmth is the winning framework, because you stay in a wise relationship long enough for when the buyer is ready to buy.